I might have mentioned before, one of the worst feeling ever existed in this world was not able to write something when you actually wanted to. This could driving me mad more than math. I used to came up with terrific advices but very often I lose it as soon I need it. Because, when my mood lies underneath my feet or at least on the same base with my own feet, abandoned on the ground, I couldn't keep my head straight and really, literally think clear. As if something has suck my ability to reflects good ideas. The worst part was feeling defeated in a war where you actually acknowledge the basic strategy from your own enemy. The "I should do something!" thought humming all around my head but instead, I sat still and waiting for the airplane passed by. Just because I could pretend it was a shooting star and make a wish (according to a well-known song these days). And oh, even worse, when the enemy was the weakest one on the list of enemy line, that shouldn't actually be on the list. Such as math. I hate math more than you hate your imbalance body or your frizzy hair or your bad day or even the way I hate airport for the last stop of leaving-goodbyes.
There I shouldn't bother mentioned the thing that I hate but sometimes to write a blog I need certain mood to feel.
Anger and feeling of missing someone were on my top two list. Because they burned in the same intensity of shit.
I wasn't in my best shape nor mood these two weeks. I gotta say, tough weeks. Interest to change wasn't around. At least not now, let me stay here for a while. I just know this, takes time. Reminiscing for a week or two, then I'll heal pretty soon.
For now, put it this way,
when distraction wasn't enough, that's when you know you need a life counselor.
P.S: It may not sounded as bad as it sounds. Exaggeration implied just for the sake of satisfaction.