Not Tonight

I study and imagine things.

But that was not the point, although I’m here not to emphasizing anything. I live without handcuff that strained me for moving around. I do move. I’m moving. On.

I have wasted too many emotions to survive with one or two thoughts that have been clouding my mind for a period of time.

Unconsciously, I fell for feeling-laundry, and buying those entire irresponsible misinterpretation acts. I’m eating uncertainty and drinking unethical hopes, all gathered in to butterflies attack and inconstant heart beat. I got nobody to blame, and I am not looking for anyone to blame. I got my wake up calls, I am waking up from my favorite nightmare, being head over heels for someone.

Time passes and giving me new answers for my unanswered questions. New, would include to changes that occurred. Piano may not sound pretty in my ears today and I may never want to go to United States anymore, or even travel East Asia.

I put my self where I stand right now, to feel what I feel right now.

I am fully aware what I saw, what I knew, what I foolishly kept recent days. The pain knowing opponent names was hauntingly beautiful, making me sick more than the sea. But I’m doing unbelievably great, because when you learned to understand and beginning to let it go, it taste… light.

I am sure for not doing this again. I’m getting my heart in one piece,

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